Blessing for Sophia

My WHOLE family slept over at our house last night!!! It was a P.A.R.T.Y!!!
I think this was Harper's very first sleepover and she was such a good girl. I stole all these photos from Melissa because I have been terrible at taking pictures lately!
I curled all the Clark girls hair with this sweet new tool I got...it took longer than I thought it would but they all looked super cute!!
Nixon and Korver needed a bath so they jumped in the sink...Max and Owen used to do that too!!
All the kids love holding Harper. We are heading up to Herriman to go to Sophia Keller's blessing.
After church we all headed to Ry and Trisha's house for lunch. We had the most delicious food!! Here is the cute Keller family: Lilly, Trisha, Sophia, Haley and Ryan. We stayed at their house all day and Max LOVED playing with their 2 dogs. It was such a great way to spend the day!!!

Rainbow Cake

I saw this recipe for rainbow cupcakes somewhere online (I think Facebook), anyway I thought they looked so cute that I went out and bought the stuff to make them!

I decided to make a cake instead but I think the cupcakes would have been easier, it was hard to spread the batter in nice layers. I have NEVER used gel food coloring before and was completely amazed at the way they work!! My mom always bought the liquid food coloring and so that is what I always buy...NEVER AGAIN!!! The colors are amazing and the cake was so moist and delicious!!!
It was a yummy treat!!!

Overnighter

Since Rich was in Nephi all week watching the Pauole kids he decided to book a room in Salt Lake for us. I dropped Max off to Pieper's for a sleepover (they were both so excited) and then Rich and I dropped Alexa and Alex off at Sule's in Herriman. They are going to spend the weekend with him.
We ate dinner at Kneader's (a first for both of us). It was pretty good. We checked into The Plaza hotel and wanted to relax in the hot tub. The hot tub was out of order and we were both really disappointed! Rich called the front desk and the guy told him that we could go to the Radisson and use their pool. It was just across the street so we headed over and hung out there for a few hours. We sat in the sauna and the hot tub and we even swam a bit! We stopped at the gas station for snacks and breakfast and headed back to the room!

The next morning we got ready and checked out. We went to Chili's for lunch and then to the movie "Alice in Wonderland" in 3-D
This is the only photo I took all weekend, these 3-D glasses are quite stylish, don't you think?
The movie was good, a little disappointing though, there was a lot of hype but still really good! We stopped in at Target for a little bit and then headed back home to pick up Max. He had tons of fun playing with Pieper and didn't want to come with us!!

I met Sule on Sunday afternoon to get the kids, they also went to Alice and Wonderland and went to their baby brother's blessing. They had a fun weekend!

The Miracle of Life

This post is for me, I decided that I commentate about our life too much and need to do more "journaling" on the blog. Since I print my blog as part of my family history I think it's important that I share my thoughts and feelings more than I have in the past, so here goes.

Yesterday I had the most amazing experience. After having 3 of my own children, I was finally able to "be on the other end" so to speak. My sweet sister in law Jennifer gave birth to a beautiful 8 lb 5 oz baby boy named Daxon and I was there for it.

I have always wanted to see a baby come into this world, I am not a pervert or a sick-o, I just find it all incredibly amazing. I was never offered a mirror (or even thought to ask for one) with my first two kids. With Max I fully intended on watching him be born but he just came so fast (barely 1 push) that we didn't even have a camera ready let alone a mirror. I have wanted to be in the room with my sisters when they have had their babies but it has never worked out. I have mentioned this several times and Jennifer has always told me that next time she has a baby I could watch. I am not sure if she thought I would actually take her up on her offer, but I did!!

She texted me when she was about an 8 and I went to the hospital. We talked and tried to patiently pass the time. It was just her, Dustin and me in the room. She made me promise that I wouldn't look at her differently and of course I did. When it was time, her legs were so numb from the epidural that they wouldn't stay in place so the Doctor put Dustin in charge of one and me the other. She pushed once and the head came right out. That moment choked me up but I held it together, then the rest of the sweet baby came out and it was...I don't even have the words, a miracle I guess is the only way to describe it. Having been on both sides now I can completely appreciate the miracle of life and I am so grateful.

Typing this up has made me very emotional and I can't really explain why. I am not sure if it because I am so thankful for the three beautiful, healthy children that I do have, or if it's the yearning I have for another one. I think I know the reason and it is the later for sure.

Last night right before I fell asleep I was re-living the events of the day and I just started sobbing. Rich is tending kids in Nephi so I had the bed to myself and I was glad, I needed to get it all out.

Rich and I wanted to have another baby right after Max was born, back in 2006. We had to have fertility treatments to help us get Max here and we tried the same thing several times after him but it just didn't work. The funny thing to me is that when I met Rich I was totally happy and content with the two kids I had and didn't want any more kids. Rich and I talked a lot about it before we got married and I never promised him that I would have more. After being married for 2 years (his due date was actually on our 2 year anniversary) Max was born. I knew that we needed one more and I have felt it ever since. I have found that for the past year this is something that I think about constantly. I can't even count the number of nieces and nephews on both sides that have been born since I had Max. Every single sister and sister-in-law has had a baby (some are even on to their second ones) since Max, everyone that is, except me. Why did I have to think about it like that, now the tears are flowing again.

I am not sure why I have such a longing for another baby if there isn't another baby for me. I know that with all the ups and downs of Rich's employment it is probably a good thing that we don't have another baby and when I think about it logically it makes perfect sense, unfortunately my heart does not have that ability and so here I am, still longing for a baby.

I am very happy for everyone who is pregnant around me, friends and family. I have 2 really close friends that are expecting twins (something I always have wanted) and a friend that has struggled with infertility for many years who is finally expecting, and I am so happy for them, but I am not going to lie, I am a little jealous.

I know that Heavenly Father knows what is best for me and my family and I have total faith that whatever happens is for a reason that I don't fully understand and I am OK with that. It makes me feel better to get that all out, I know that if there is someone that needs to come to our family it will happen one way or another, I just need to keep having faith and patience.